Sunday, February 22, 2009

People are Funny Part 2

So, brandon felt that I should qualify my last post. I willingly put my life out there on this blog. I am in no way ashamed of how I became pregnant, and honestly, I don't mind talking about it. What I do mind is for strangers--meaning people I have literally just met (within minutes) asking me about the conception of my child. For heaven's sake, these people don't even know my name and they feel ok with asking about my sex life??? That is what gets me. I do not mind when friends,acquaintances or even blog readers ask. I also don't mind when other ladies who are struggling with infertility ask me questions.

The reason it bothers me with strangers is because A. it's just nosiness and serves no purpose. B. they usually say "oh, well then" in a You Got What You Deserve tone, C. they act as though my kids are somehow less miraculous b/c they weren't spontaneous...see twin mom's comment in previous post, and D. this is the biggy. There is absolutely no way to answer these questions the way I want to without me becoming the bad guy. What I want to say is, "That is really personal". Or "Why would you ask that?" Or "I don't like talking about my sex life". Etc. But anything I say in that vein makes me seem snarky, when in truth, the asker should be embarassed not me. They aren't asking me what time it is. They are asking for very intimate information without giving it a second thought, and they expect an answer. When i give one, some of them continue to probe for more information. My only option, other than giving out the intimate details of my childrens' conception to a total stranger for no good reason is to lie, and say 'no, we didn't have help getting pregnant". I don't like lying, and I like it even less when I do it because it is just easier, and then the person makes some snide comment about people who do infertility treatment. I just can't win. Either way, I walk away from the conversation feeling violated and wishing people could just hold their tongues.

So again, No one reading this blog has offended me by asking. I am pretty sure I have talked about it on the blog making it fair game in that regard. I just get tired of the general public asking for no good reason. Hopefully that clears things up. :)

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